NEW YORK (The Borowitz Report)—After news broke that the Manhattan District Attorney was convening a grand jury, Donald J. Trump changed the name of his company to the Eric Trump Organization.
The former President made the announcement in a press conference at his signature Manhattan building, the newly renamed Eric Trump Tower.
“Changing the name of the company is no big deal,” he said. “It’s going to be the same company that it’s always been—with Eric Trump running the show and me just following his orders.”
“It’s only fitting to call this company the Eric Trump Organization, because Eric is responsible for everything it has ever done,” he added. “This is long overdue.”
Asked about the grand jury, Trump said, “From what I’ve heard, they’re going to be looking into Eric’s businesses quite strongly. I hope he hasn’t gotten himself into a big mess. He’s been a great boss to work for all these years, and I wish him well.”
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