The Olympic rings may not interlink, unless they are in the same pod.
The relay baton must be sanitized between handoffs.
All competitors must wear face masks.
Plague-doctor masks are an acceptable alternative.
Hybrid “in-person” and “at-home” competition is available.
Due to attachment-theory problems, pets are allowed to join.
The Olympic Village will be less “sensual”; athletes will have to set “personal records.”
Medals come with complimentary sourdough starter.
The Olympic torch must get temperature checks and contact tracing.
Bobsledders must be six feet apart at all times.
Nothing changes in curling—it’s perfect.