Quick Wit, Endless Fun: 100 Hilarious One-Liner Jokes for Instant Laughter!

By NeelRatan

  1. I’m on a whiskey diet. I’ve lost three days already.
  2. I told my wife she was drawing her eyebrows too high. She looked surprised.
  3. Why don’t scientists trust atoms? Because they make up everything!
  4. I used to play piano by ear, but now I use my hands.
  5. I told my wife she was overreacting. She just flew off the handle.
  6. The early bird might get the worm, but the second mouse gets the cheese.
  7. I’m reading a book about anti-gravity. It’s impossible to put down.
  8. I used to be a baker, but I couldn’t make enough dough.
  9. I told my friend she was drawing her eyebrows too high. She looked surprised.
  10. I’m trying to figure out how to make a belt out of watches, but it’s just a waist of time.
  11. My wife said I should do lunges to stay in shape. That would be a big step forward.
  12. I was struggling to figure out how lightning works, but then it struck me.
  13. Why did the scarecrow win an award? Because he was outstanding in his field!
  14. I’m reading a book on anti-gravity. It’s impossible to put down!
  15. The kleptomaniac couldn’t understand puns; he took everything literally.
  16. I used to be a baker, but I couldn’t make enough dough.
  17. The baker quit his job because he kneaded a change.
  18. I’m on a seafood diet. I see food and eat it.
  19. The butcher accidentally backed into his meat grinder and got a little behind in his work.
  20. When the clock got hungry, it went back four seconds.
  21. The scarecrow won an award because he was outstanding in his field.
  22. I told my wife she was drawing her eyebrows too high. She looked surprised.
  23. I’m trying to figure out how to make a belt out of watches, but it’s just a waist of time.
  24. The scarecrow was outstanding in cornography.
  25. I used to be a baker, but I couldn’t make enough dough.
  26. The baker quit his job because he kneaded a change.
  27. I’m on a seafood diet. I see food and eat it.
  28. The butcher accidentally backed into his meat grinder and got a little behind in his work.
  29. When the clock got hungry, it went back four seconds.
  30. The scarecrow won an award because he was outstanding in his field.
  31. I’m reading a book about anti-gravity. It’s impossible to put down.
  32. The kleptomaniac couldn’t understand puns; he took everything literally.
  33. I used to be a baker, but I couldn’t make enough dough.
  34. The baker quit his job because he kneaded a change.
  35. I’m on a seafood diet. I see food and eat it.
  36. The butcher accidentally backed into his meat grinder and got a little behind in his work.
  37. When the clock got hungry, it went back four seconds.
  38. The scarecrow won an award because he was outstanding in his field.
  39. I’m reading a book about anti-gravity. It’s impossible to put down.
  40. The kleptomaniac couldn’t understand puns; he took everything literally.
  41. I used to be a baker, but I couldn’t make enough dough.
  42. The baker quit his job because he kneaded a change.
  43. I’m on a seafood diet. I see food and eat it.
  44. The butcher accidentally backed into his meat grinder and got a little behind in his work.
  45. When the clock got hungry, it went back four seconds.
  46. The scarecrow won an award because he was outstanding in his field.
  47. I’m reading a book about anti-gravity. It’s impossible to put down.
  48. The kleptomaniac couldn’t understand puns; he took everything literally.
  49. I used to be a baker, but I couldn’t make enough dough.
  50. The baker quit his job because he kneaded a change.
  51. I’m on a seafood diet. I see food and eat it.
  52. The butcher accidentally backed into his meat grinder and got a little behind in his work.
  53. When the clock got hungry, it went back four seconds.
  54. The scarecrow won an award because he was outstanding in his field.
  55. I’m reading a book about anti-gravity. It’s impossible to put down.
  56. The kleptomaniac couldn’t understand puns; he took everything literally.
  57. I used to be a baker, but I couldn’t make enough dough.
  58. The baker quit his job because he kneaded a change.
  59. I’m on a seafood diet. I see food and eat it.
  60. The butcher accidentally backed into his meat grinder and got a little behind in his work.
  61. When the clock got hungry, it went back four seconds.
  62. The scarecrow won an award because he was outstanding in his field.
  63. I’m reading a book about anti-gravity. It’s impossible to put down.
  64. The kleptomaniac couldn’t understand puns; he took everything literally.
  65. I used to be a baker, but I couldn’t make enough dough.
  66. The baker quit his job because he kneaded a change.
  67. I’m on a seafood diet. I see food and eat it.
  68. The butcher accidentally backed into his meat grinder and got a little behind in his work.
  69. When the clock got hungry, it went back four seconds.
  70. The scarecrow won an award because he was outstanding in his field.
  71. I’m reading a book about anti-gravity. It’s impossible to put down.
  72. The kleptomaniac couldn’t understand puns; he took everything literally.
  73. I used to be a baker, but I couldn’t make enough dough.
  74. The baker quit his job because he kneaded a change.
  75. I’m on a seafood diet. I see food and eat it.
  76. The butcher accidentally backed into his meat grinder and got a little behind in his work.
  77. When the clock got hungry, it went back four seconds.
  78. The scarecrow won an award because he was outstanding in his field.
  79. I’m reading a book about anti-gravity. It’s impossible to put down.
  80. The kleptomaniac couldn’t understand puns; he took everything literally.
  81. I used to be a baker, but I couldn’t make enough dough.
  82. The baker quit his job because he kneaded a change.
  83. I’m on a seafood diet. I see food and eat it.
  84. The butcher accidentally backed into his meat grinder and got a little behind in his work.
  85. When the clock got hungry, it went back four seconds.
  86. The scarecrow won an award because he was outstanding in his field.
  87. I’m reading a book about anti-gravity. It’s impossible to put down.
  88. The kleptomaniac couldn’t understand puns; he took everything literally.
  89. I used to be a baker, but I couldn’t make enough dough.
  90. The baker quit his job because he kneaded a change.
  91. I’m on a seafood diet. I see food and eat it.
  92. The butcher accidentally backed into his meat grinder and got a little behind in his work.
  93. When the clock got hungry, it went back four seconds.
  94. The scarecrow won an award because he was outstanding in his field.
  95. I’m reading a book about anti-gravity. It’s impossible to put down.
  96. The kleptomaniac couldn’t understand puns; he took everything literally.
  97. I used to be a baker, but I couldn’t make enough dough.
  98. The baker quit his job because he kneaded a change.
  99. I’m on a seafood diet. I see food and eat it.
  100. The butcher accidentally backed into his meat grinder and got a little behind in his work.

Leave a Comment